Pirate Life in San Blas

To get from Colombia to Panama by road is basically impossible. There's an immense swampy jungle full of drug smugglers, mosquitos and wild animals waiting to kill you (apparently). So the better options are flying or taking a boat. Flights in this part of the world aren't cheap so when the option is USD$400 for a flight or USD$500 for 5 days on a boat and a chance to see the San Blas islands of Panama, I opted for the later (even though I have a history of sea sickness!). Well I mean, they look like this. 

So I chose to go on a boat called the Wildcard because it was the biggest and I was hoping the chances for sea sickness would be less. I met up with my group the night before to go through the details. I turned up to be greeted by 8 Australian boys and a yank. Thankfully later on a British couple and a Dutch couple also appeared. 

The next night we met up early in the evening and were all aboard the boat by about 7pm. After cruising out of Cartagena we hit the open sea around 9pm and were asked to go below deck. Apparently finding a man overboard during the day is hard but at night it's basically impossible. So here's my bed for the next five nights...top bunk. And that was one of the better beds since it was stinking hot further down where the other beds were.

As soon as we started moving I realised I was going to be in trouble so I took some sea sickness tablets. They basically knock you out so I was in a coma shortly thereafter. I managed to wake up for breakfast but couldn't handle being out on deck so I went back to my room to lay down and promptly resumed my coma. 

I got up for lunch and then basically repeated my morning routine. At 5pm I went out for some fresh air and to advise people I was alive. I soon started feeling ill again so I took some more tablets. Five minutes later I had my head over the side of the boat but managed to talk myself into not vomiting. I knew if I spewed up those tablets I'd never get any down. Soon all was well again and I was back in a coma. 

After a lot of rain and storms overnight I woke up to the feeling of stillness and this view outside.

Now I'm not going to tell you there's much to do in San Blas, because there's not. We spent the next three days snorkelling, drinking, swimming and exploring tiny islands and marvelling at how picturesque it was. 

Oh and we bought some coconuts from the locals which we of course added rum to.

In the evenings we'd hang on the boat and have dinner and try and feel clean (sin shower). I even washed my hair in the ocean. Surprisingly effective. 

There's apparently 365 islands in San Blas but the sea level is rising and they're disappearing. Only 49 of them are inhabited and the inhabitants are an independent group of Indians known as the Kuna People. I couldn't really photograph them but they are tiny humans. The women dress in brightly coloured clothes and wear gold nose rings. Here is a photo courtesy of Google. And yes, they legitimately look like this.

They make the 'molas' that they wear around their midriffs and for years have traded those, coconuts and lobsters with passing traders and pirates (true story). The men are skilled fishermen and one night on the boat we had a dinner with a lobster each! We also had crab and some fish we caught off the boat. Here's the captain and first mate killing the fish...with rum. A technique I was not aware of!

And here's a crab we got from the locals. He was a beast!

After the three days in the islands we headed overnight for mainland Panama. Back on the sea sickness pills and back into a coma. We finally arrived in Portobello in the morning but had to wait ages for our passports to be processed. By the time we got two buses to Panama City it was after dark (but it does get dark at 5.30 here!). The daylight savings lovers would be livid. 

Anyway I spent the next two days walking around Panama City feeling even more sea sick than on the boat!